Team Building

Have you ever lived by a train?  Or airport?  Do you know anyone who has?

It’s said that if you live by a train long enough, you won’t even hear it eventually.  You get used to the noise, the rumbling, the intrusion.

It feels normal, just like our hyperconnected world of cell phone notifications.

News, notifications, and nuisances barge into every part of your day without any concern about how you will be impacted.

84% of employees report being distracted at work.  Astoundingly, workers are interrupted every 12 minutes – and it takes 25 minutes to pick up where they left off!

Living in an epidemic of distractions and constant interruptions feels normal, but it’s unhealthy.

Unhurried, undistracted time is essential for our health.  In every way.  Mentally and emotionally.  At work and home.

While this often requires being alone, there is a difference between solitude and loneliness.

How Does the Impact of Solitude Differ From Loneliness?

Solitude creates space for meaningful reflection and restructuring your priorities to reflect your values better.

Engaging in solitude appropriately has positive effects on your personal and professional life.  Spending intentional time alone can sharpen your focus and provide clarity that’s hard to attain in the middle of a busy life.

Loneliness, on the other hand, tends toward isolation.  It can precipitate burnout.  When a person feels disconnected from others in meaningful relationships – personally and professionally – the end result is often tragic.

A sense of loneliness can spread like an emotional wildfire in a person’s being, consuming every area of their self-concept.

This is why the benefits of reflective solitude are so profound and have an impact far beyond our immediate sphere of influence.

Hurt People Hurt People

No one makes it through this life without accumulating a few scars along the way.  The story behind our scars – emotional and physical – often influences how we interact with the world around us.

Most of the sharp, prickly, selfish, and inconsiderate things we do stem from a place of deep woundedness.

As the saying goes, “Hurt people hurt people.”  That is, people are most likely to hurt others when they are hurting themselves.

Facing our pain requires enormous strength.

The problem is that our hyper-distracted culture makes it difficult to withdraw and tend to our emotional needs.

What we don’t know about ourselves influences us in ways we don’t fully grasp.  Psychologist David Benner provides incredible insight.

He says that the parts of ourselves that we are unaware of “become stronger, not weaker.  Operating out of sight and beyond awareness, they have an increasing influence on our behavior.”

Great Leaders Prioritize Solitude

Regardless of how extraverted you may be, how many people rely on you, or how demanding your schedule is – you need time alone.

In their book “Lead Yourself First,” authors Raymond Kethledge and Michael Erwin identify how great leaders prioritize solitude.  Dwight Eisenhower, James Mattis, Jane Goodall, and Martin Luther King are a few examples they provide.

Kethledge and Erwin draw out how time in solitude allowed these great leaders to gain clarity, creativity, emotional balance, and moral courage.

Many businesses fail to realize their potential because the leaders are so focused on working in the business that they can’t work on the business.

Or themselves.

Self-Care is Paramount to Care Well for Others

Navy SEALS train so ruthlessly that each SEAL possesses superhuman strength and tenacity.  It’s said that Navy SEAL training is the most rigorous training in the world.

Out of every ten soldiers that begin, only two finish.  Why do Navy SEALS train so vigorously?

To take care of others.

In a recent conversation,  former SEAL Chad Williams told me, “The mantra in the SEALs is ‘Team, buddy, me – in that order.’”

For a SEAL to effectively take care of the team and their buddy – before taking care of themselves – they must train themselves to be equipped and prepared to do so.

It’s like the instructions we receive before a plane leaves the runway.  We’re told that in the event of a crash, we must put on our oxygen masks before helping others so that we can help others.

Self-care does not have to be selfish.  With the right motivation, self-care and solitude can be among the best gifts we give others.

No SEAL wants a teammate who isn’t healthy enough to serve others.  No employee wants a boss who is unaware of their own wounds and ends up hurting others.

You can offer something better.  But it will require shutting off distractions, disengaging from responsibilities, and opening yourself up to your inner person.

Solitude is Categorically Different From Loneliness and Isolation

It’s essential to differentiate solitude from isolation or loneliness.  We define solitude as a healthy, personal discipline that allows you to engage in meaningful self-reflection.

Loneliness, however, is a state of “sadness because one has no friends or company.”

While you can be lonely in a crowd, you cannot have solitude there.  Solitude is a virtue to be pursued.  Loneliness is a danger to be addressed.

A recent Harvard study found a significant correlation between feeling lonely at work and exhaustion.

“The more people are exhausted, the lonelier they feel.”

Loneliness profoundly affects individual health, as demonstrated by several studies by leading universities.

One study led by Sarah Pressman of the University of California at Irvine showed that obesity reduced longevity by 20%, smoking by 50%, and loneliness by 70%.

Conclusion?  Loneliness is as dangerous to your health as smoking and obesity – combined.

Corporately, the toll of loneliness on disengagement is staggering.

Loneliness leads to disengagement.  According to Smith’s School of Business and the Gallup organization, disengagement leads to these massive organizational issues:

• 37% higher absenteeism
• 49 % more accidents
• 16% lower profitability
• 65% lower share price over time

And that’s just business.  Loneliness is impacting society on a historical, global scale.

In May 2023, the Surgeon declared loneliness an epidemic.  This puts the US five years behind the UK, where there has been a “Minister of Loneliness” at work since 2018, and two years behind Japan.   The Society for Human Resources Management (SHRM) cited in March 2021 that ~28% of employees felt isolated at work.

Loneliness needs to be addressed.  Solitude needs to be embraced.

Leaders in the Workplace Have the Opportunity to Shape History

Our mission at the Full Sail Leadership Academy is to make the world a better place by making workplaces better.

Loneliness and distraction are being declared epidemics in our day.  Leader – you can do something about this.  You can do more than improve your company’s bottom line.

You are positioned to usher health, healing, and wholeness into the world through your workplace.

Step up.  Be bold.  Step into solitude and gain the self-awareness you need to address and grow in the areas of healing your heart longs for.

Let your self-care work propel you to create a culture of health where you can care for others.  People tend to gravitate to others who possess traits they themselves wish to convey to the world.

Learning by example is only one, yet vital, way we adapt throughout our lifetime. You’ll be amazed at what happens when you’re entire team is encouraged to cheer each other on.

Watch the World Change by Changing Someone’s World

A large insurance company attended one of our workshops a few years ago. Total assets for this company are $3.8 billion, with 1,400 employees nationwide.

While everyone eventually went out on the boats, there was a great deal of reticence as we worked through the classroom portion of the workshop.

One of the participants was afraid of the water and could not swim. Another was extremely afraid of getting seasick.

It was amazing to see the participant who was afraid of the water conquer her fears as her teammates encouraged her.

Even though she had the opportunity of bailing out and staying in the classroom to plot the course of the rest of her team, she sensed the loss of missing out on an incredible learning experience.

Our captain and first mate on her boat helped her find the most secure place to sit. Our team also showed this participant that there was no harm or fool in donning a life jacket to make herself more comfortable.

After she did all that, she slowly began to explore other areas of the boat. Eventually, this unwilling participant became an advocate for getting outside your comfort zone, saying, “I’m so glad I pushed through my fear; this was one of the best things I’ve done in my life.”

The participant who was worried about sea -sickness saw the power of her team as they rallied around her and distracted her from her fear.

In many cases, seasickness can be overcome by distracting the mind. In this case, our participant was encouraged to drive the boat when she became a bit queasy.

While she was a bit timid about driving the boat, once we taught her how – she lost her seasickness, and we kept her at the wheel for a reasonable amount of time, whereas in a typical workshop, we rotate team members through the driving opportunity.

Keeping this participant at the helm helped to keep the seasickness at bay. Eventually, she got tired of driving and went to sit down in her seat.

As soon as that happened, she returned to feeling nauseous and seasick. While watching their teammate overcome and then succumb to seasickness, the team learned some of the biggest lessons.

The rallying effect of working together to beat a “crisis” showed the team the importance of caring for others while caring for themselves. It also showed the crew the amazing power of mind over matter and using the power of positivity to get past difficult times.

Crush the Difference Between Solitude and Loneliness in Your Workplace

What are you waiting for?  Elected officials are sending out a beacon, begging people to step up and respond to these epidemics of loneliness and distraction.

The world is reeling, longing for space to be seen – and accepted.  People are desperate for someone to help them turn off the distractions so that they can tune into their deeper purposes.

Your organization needs you to lead.  By example.  In humility.

The time is now.  You can make the world a better place by making your workplace better.  We can help.

Our workshops are customized to meet your company’s most pressing needs.  You’ll be trained in the classroom, sent out on the water, and provided an opportunity for reflection and growth.

We’ll also work with you to create an actionable, 12-month plan to ensure the progress you paid for!

Reach out now….before you get distracted 😉

How many lives do you think a Rolex could save?  This question haunted Oskar Schindler.

During World War II, Schindler was instrumental in saving thousands of lives as genocide threatened to extinguish the Jewish people and more.

Still, during Schindler’s List’s famous and moving closing scene, he is portrayed as looking at his watch and wondering how many more lives could have been spared had he bartered his timepiece for a human being.

In a world filled with deadlines, distractions, and deals to close, even the best leaders can lose sight of what matters most.

It’s not money.

It’s people.

Every once in a while, every leader needs a wake-up call to redirect their best energy to focus on what matters most.

You are not leading a machine for profit.  You are a steward leader entrusted with supporting human beings on their voyage to a brighter future.

Transforming Leaders into Stewards

Our mission at Full Sail Leadership Academy is to: “make the world a better place by making workplaces better.”

We reiterate this message everywhere we can.  Not only for the sake of clear communication.  But also because we need to be reminded.

I need to be reminded.

Life can pull at you from so many competing directions that you can feel like you’re living in a modern version of an ancient torture rack.

Exceeding clients’ expectations is no joke.  Bills have to be paid.  Market share must be captured.  Capital must be in the coffers to compensate employees with a livable wage.

And yet.

The ultimate mission cannot change.  Bob Chapman provides a remarkable perspective in his book, “Everybody Matters.”  He writes:

“… ‘my people’ are not ‘my people,’  They are someone else’s son or daughter, brother or sister, or mom or dad.”

How we treat our team has a cascading effect on communities.  A husband who gets treated poorly at work may go home and snap at his wife, who then berates the kids, who in turn yell at the dog, who then chases the cat that climbs up a tree which requires the husband to go up and rescue it.

This may not be too far of an exaggeration.

If your workplace isn’t inspiring, encouraging, or peaceful – and people invest their best energy there – what attitude do they carry with them back into their world?

Of course, work and life have a symbiotic relationship with each other.  Hence the move toward embracing work/life harmony.

Don’t let this discourage or overwhelm you.  You can have the greatest impact on the world in this pivotal space.

We can help you stand in the gap and leverage your position as a leader to make the world a better place by making your workplace better.

3 Rules Exceptional Stewards Leaders Live By

Sailing often provides vivid, life-shaping illustrations of how healthy leadership creates the context people need to flourish in the workplace.

Before boarding his vessel, the outstanding captain, John Kretschmer, taught us three lessons on steward leadership that can bring health, dignity, and effectiveness to any organization.

Kretschmer is the author of six best-selling books on sailing and has sailed across the ocean 155 times.

If using these three simple rules can guide sailboats across the ocean, they can guide your business to the next horizon.

1: Stay on the Boat

This may seem simple.  Even self-protective.  After all, who jumps off a boat in the middle of the ocean?

But despair doesn’t discriminate.  No leader brings their crew across the ocean without facing despair, desperation, discouragement, and more.

At times, the extent of the threat is perceived.  More often, though, it’s legit.  Every business over 25 years old has faced massive cultural threats entirely out of its control.

• The Dot Com Bubble Burst
• The Great Recession
• The Covid 19 Pandemic

Beyond these storms are the headwinds of a leader’s personal issues, the jet stream of employee performance, and the unrelenting waves of decision-making.

Yes, decision fatigue is recognized by the American Medical Association as a mental health condition that must be tended to.

What happens to the attitude of the crew when the captain gives way to despair and contemplates jumping ship?

What happens to the workplace when the leader checks out and checks into smoother sailing on a different ship?

Of course, this does not mean that every leader needs to remain in their position regardless of their personal needs or what’s best for the business.

There are healthy reasons for leaders to transition out of their role.  Eventually, everyone must.

But a stable, committed, secure leader sets the cultural foundation – within a company – that allows the team to navigate the storms that will inevitably come.

The stability that your leadership provides extends far beyond the reach of the office walls.  The world can feel volatile.  Life is fragile.

When your team knows they can rely on you, this will give them the security they need to stay invested and present in the other areas of their lives.

2: Assholes on Board

Pardon my French.  But this is important.  You can’t overlook this rule.

Captain John would not allow anyone to treat a fellow crew member disrespectfully or uncivilly.

John’s boat Quetzal is forty-seven feet long.  The Captain said that since the boat was only so big, there was no room for anyone to act like an asshole to anyone on board.

Your workplace is only so large.  If toxicity permeates your workplace, it will loom over and creep into every area of every team member’s life.

Children will have a parent whose patience has been exhausted before they even start to help with homework.

Neighbors will be greeted by closed garage doors instead of a friendly wave because people have already expended their emotional energy.

Therapists get their schedules filled because people aren’t designed to live in a disrespectful, contentious environment.

Manuela Priesemuth at the Harvard Business Review has found that toxicity at the executive level of an organization tends to spread throughout – and beyond it.

“Employees report feeling emotionally drained, experience lower well-being, and even increased conflict at home.”

Captain Kretschmer stressed the attitude that we should have towards our fellow crew members.  Business leaders must stress the importance of civility and courtesy toward team members and customers.

Leaders as community stewards must model how civility and courtesy start with their attitude. It’s all about developing a caring attitude towards each other and the organization.

3: Take Care of Yourself to Take Care of Others

The first two rules depend entirely on a massive assumption: that the leader – you – are healthy.

Comprehensively healthy.  And humble.

The old saying rings true – hurt people hurt people.

Managing behaviors won’t get the job done.  It’s not sustainable.  It is exhausting.  Leader – you must go beyond techniques and actually care about your people.

As people.  Human beings.  Not as a means to an end.  Not as a number on the balance sheet.  But as someone else’s father or mother, sister or brother.

And that starts with viewing yourself with the dignity you deserve.  If you are driven to find your value in what you achieve, you will push your team to achieve more than is reasonable.

If you don’t value your life outside of work, you won’t be able to honor your crew’s commitments to their community.

When a leader values productivity over character, they overlook the traits of any high achiever, even if they make a workplace toxic – and wreak havoc beyond the office.

Your value, worth, and dignity must be grounded in a source larger than your platform, more reliable than money, and more secure than your popularity.

No one gets to the captain’s chair without accumulating some scars along the way.  Do you have the strength to admit your weakness?  Do you have the courage to pursue personal healing?

Could it be that the greatest gift you give your employees is admitting that you also need support?

If you give yourself permission to heal and grow – your team will feel they have the same permission.

What might happen if, instead of treating a team member poorly because of your own poor self-concept – you treated them with civility and compassion?

Then that husband goes home and is tender toward his wife, who in turn is patient with the kids, who are kind to the dog, leaving the cat alone, who then curls up on the husband’s lap to provide comfort instead of requiring rescue.

Transforming Leaders into Stewards on the Sea

A better world is within your reach.  Together we can make the world a better place by making your workplace better.

One step you can take to jumpstart your journey of creating a healthy workplace is to join us on the sea for a workshop.

As your team sets sail, you’ll watch these three rules spring to life.  We start with a classroom session to ensure safety.  Then we work on the water for the experience of a lifetime!

After this, we debrief and provide you with a personalized growth plan, including actionable steps, so that you can lead your crew to a brighter future.

Reach out today and learn how Full Sail Leadership Academy can equip you to care for your team – and make the world a better place.